We had such a great meeting on Thursday night. Our guest speaker was Beth Fisher, mother of four teenagers and wife to Tim. Together they pastor Walkersville Community Church. She gave us some great insights on how to deal with conflict.
The biggest thing I took away was when she said, “Emotionally loaded words are very easy to get out and they are very strong”. Sometimes we need to apologize, even to our children when the conflict rises to a certain level and we make mistakes. Your children will learn humility and have an opportunity to practice forgiveness.
Some of the pointers Beth gave were to:
1. “Cool Off” when in the midst of a conflict. Take a step back.
2. Use “I” statements instead of “you…”
3. Restate what you have heard the other person say, “What I heard you say is that….”
4. Take responsibility- if you mess up apologize for it (but don’t justify your mistake).
5. Brainstorm solutions.
6. Affirm/Forgive/Reconcile.
Then Beth asked us to think about a few things:
What filter do I have for the way I react?
Who do I have regular conflict with?
Have a mentor (and be a mentor).
Know the things that trigger conflict with your child.
We appreciate Beth’s insight and wisdom that she shared with us.
Our next meeting will be December 8th, 2011 from 6-8 PM (remember no meeting on November 24th due to the holiday). Our guest speaker will be Annie Mahr and the topic will be “Developing a Sense of Respect”.
We have a fan page on Facebook to help us communicate in various ways. If you are on Facebook please “Like” VT MOPS to get updates. We will also be setting up events for our meetings so we are sure to have enough food and workers for your children.
Have a very Happy Thanksgiving!
VT MOPS Steering Team
Vicky, Lacy, Natalie & Tammy
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